1) List about 20 things that you want to say to people, but never will.
2) Don't say who they are.
3) Never discuss it again.

(Note: I will certainly end up breaking 1 and 3 at some point.)

1. I love you, and always will. There will never be any problem I have concerning you that I won't tell you (eventually) and probably none concerning myself that I won't also share with you. Any wrong you ever do me is forgiven even before you do it. On the rare times I am mad at you, it is only because I love you. I will always be there for you. I am right here.

2. You are one of the best friends I ever had, and I might almost come close to loving you in a strange kind of way. But I will certainly never tell you that.

3. I very much admire you even though I almost never agree with anything you say. You have many demons and need to learn to be at peace with yourself and the world, even though it seems impossible.

4. You are one of the most depressed, tormented, and emotionally challenged people I have ever met, and you have completely disappointed me and others who love you on many occassions. But I still love you and firmly believe there is hope for you yet.

5. You have done horrible things to me and they never helped improve any situation. But I understand that in some ways I deserved a lot of it and I always forgive you. I will always love you and take care of you, but I will not allow you to control my life.

6. I'm so sorry that there were times when I wasn't there for you when you needed me. It is one of my biggest regrets and I hope to make up for it some how.

7. You are one of my best friends and I without a doubt love you. In fact, you are the only person I have ever loved who has never hurt me in any way, and I will always be grateful for that. I'm sorry if I've ever hurt you.

8. You made me so very upset that I can't even let myself deal with this issue, but I still respect you, your authority, and fully accept it with all my heart.

9. I can't believe I ever fell for you. What on earth was I thinking? It was so unlike me. Eh, at least you're smart.

10. You used to inspire me with hope with your amazing God given gift, but have let me down ever since you began to misuse it. I hope you grow up one day and see what you have become.

11. There was a time when I thought you might make a good friend in a place where I had none. I was wrong.

12. You have treated me better than almost any other adult I can think of, and I love you for it. Thank you for always trusting me.

13. I know that in some ways I must make you very sad, but thank you for trusting me with what means the most to you, even though I know it must hurt.

14. I've known you for so long that I take for granted that you will always be there, and thus forget to contact you. But you are going in a direction now that really disturbs me and it scares me to think what will come of it.

15. I am certain that our ideologies couldn't be further from each other, but you've always been an inspiration to me none the less. In many ways, I hope to be like you one day.

16. Thank you for putting up with me even though I'm a terrible procrastinator. You always seem to have faith in my abilities and I will never know why. I hope to be just like you one day.

17. You have hurt...no...devestated the people I love the most in this world, but I forgive you of it entirely. I still don't like you or the way you treat God's precious ones, but I must admit I can't imagine home without you showing up at least every once in a while to stir things up a bit. Yeah, I might as well try to keep you around.

18. I owe you a debt I will never be able to pay. Without you, I would never have met the person who means the most to me and would likely not have ever realized my true potential. You died nearly 400 years before I was born, and yet you seem to know exactly how I feel. Thank you.

19. You are so good and so pure, that at times I'm embarrased to even talk to you. But at the same time you are so kind, so welcoming, and so loving, that I can't help but turn to you in times of my greatest need. You have always been a mother to me. I love you.

20. You have suffered so much because of me, yet you take me back again and again. No matter how many times I fall, you always catch me. You sustain me in my darkest hour, and have lead me to my moments of greatest triumph. I love you above else 'i the world, and please help me to always do so.